As I enter year two of my unofficial major in parenting, while friends are becoming or about to become parents and Vietnam rolls out car seat rules, I want to jot down a few thoughts from personal experience and from years of working on advertising for the mom-and-baby category.
I hesitated for ages, partly because friends might feel uncomfortable reading this and partly because I could lose clients in this very industry.
The mom-and-baby space is huge; it is not just diapers and formula but also education, entertainment, healthcare—anything parents are willing to buy for their kids. Regardless of the product, brands circle around two core insights: "the anxiety of not giving your child the best" and "the desire to build the image of a wise parent."
First, we have to agree that these insights are not inherently wrong; using them as a foundation for MarCom is fine. What is indefensible is the execution that digs into guilt and insecurity until parents feel miserable.
Let me start with prenatal milk, arguably the first checkpoint on the parenting journey. Ads constantly promise full nutrition for the fetus, lower risks of defects, and healthier development. Just reading that is enough to trigger an expecting mom's anxiety; she immediately wants to buy out of fear, sometimes under pressure from a well-meaning husband.
But very few moms know that once they start drinking prenatal milk, the odds of uncontrollable weight gain skyrocket (people often joke the weight goes to mom, not the baby) and the risk of gestational diabetes increases. Beyond fetal risks, putting on too much weight means months of postnatal effort to slim down, crushed self-esteem, and when piled onto sleep deprivation and new-mom stress, it becomes fertile ground for postpartum depression. To outsiders it sounds trivial, but not recognizing your own body after birth is real pain.
Hardly anyone goes public saying prenatal milk did that to them because it's easier to console yourself that you gained weight for the baby.
At prenatal checkups, almost no doctor dares to proactively push prenatal milk; even when brands partner with clinics, the most they can do is hand out samples rather than ask doctors to prescribe it. The only general advice is to eat balanced meals unless you have a special condition that blocks access to regular nutrition. Prenatal milk does not even exist in some countries—you can fact-check that yourself.
Prenatal milk marketers want to intensify the feeling of "having to do only the best things for your child" so they can keep parents in the funnel and upsell the next batch of products.
Next up is education. Last month my sibling (whose child is one) forwarded an ad that literally said: "Waiting until kindergarten to start English is already too late! - 30 free trial spots for kids from age 1". I swore out loud. Yet again, this ad barges straight into parental insecurity while implying that smart parents sign their kids up for English classes at age one so they do not fall behind.
Scientifically, early exposure to a second language is great, but nothing is "too late" if you only start in kindergarten. Every family has different realities—make the call based on your actual capacity and needs.
Finally, let's talk about car seats, which I am using as a stand-in for the endless parade of things parents buy in five daily orders: clothes, toys, snacks, weaning gadgets, bookshelves, playpens, imported formula, you name it. I have been diving deep into the car seat universe in Vietnam and abroad; the more I researched, the more I wanted the 10-million-VND models with 360-degree rotation, eight recline levels, impact-absorbing fabric, twelve headrest positions—because they make me feel like a wise parent doing the absolute best.
If you are wealthy, no problem. But most of us are not. I ended up buying a far simpler, cheaper seat that still meets safety standards, and luckily my daughter rides happily in it no matter the distance. The point is simple: you do not need expensive or "best-looking" gear to be a good parent. Don't buy just to prove to others that you can do the most for your child. Don't buy only to shoulder more pressure.
In short, parenting always comes with insecurity and the urge to give your child the best—that is normal. Just stay grounded and repeat the mantra "do the best within your means; if you're okay, your child will be okay". And all I ask of brands is to at least "first, do no harm".
